My issues with soldering really got to me today in class. I ended up having a little meltdown.
It started yesterday when someone expressed some doubts about me taking this time to work on my jewelry business. That person wondered why I don't go back to a 9-5 job and just keep jewelry as my hobby. That person doesn't really understand my plans.
The thing is, I've always been an ambitious, but cautious, person. I never persued music as a career because there are a million talented flute players out there and it seemed like too big a risk. Instead, I became a journalist, which I LOVED. But this was my way of doing something creative -- writing -- only doing in a "safe" form.
And I succeeded. I was at the magazine for 14 years and had many other writing jobs prior to that. But there were a lot of things I didn't like about being in an office environment. Now that I have this time, I'd really like to see just how successful I can make my jewelry/freelance writing businesses. I'm fortuate that I'm able to do this and what's funny is that I'm working harder than I ever did at the office! I was at the mag from about 9:30-5:30, but now I usually start in the mornings and end late at night. But it's worth it if I can do well and be my own boss.
Anyway, this person's doubts made ME doubt myself and it affected my performance in class today. We were continuing work on our stacking rings and when I went to solder my silver ring, the ring just melted. It was awful. When I told the teacher, she just laughed and said, "Oops," but my mind went to a place, "You suck. You can't do this. You'll never succeed as a jewelry designer." I ran to the bathroom and began bawling. It was pretty humiliating.
Fortunately, I was able to collect myself and returned to class. I'm not sure if anyone knew how upset I was -- I hope not! But the teacher showed me what I was doing wrong and soldered my next ring with me. I then tried one on my own and I got it!!!!
I think I need to not put so much pressure on myself. I have a bad habit of wanting to get things right away, and that almost never happens. I need to just enjoy the process and stop letting others' opinions influence my work.
To purchase my jewelry, head to Naomi's Designs.
No comments:
Post a Comment